What is shaping up to be a snooze-fest of an election just got a little more interesting and dare I might say, a little more sexy! Porn star, and all around nice gal; Stormy Daniels says she might run for embattled Louisiana senator David Vitter's seat. If her brand of smarts and sex appeal hypnotizes the people of Louisiana into giving her the win and she runs on a Democratic ticket, the Dems will have a filibuster-proof 60 seats in the Senate.
Remember David Vitter? When rumors started to fly that he might have seen a prostitute or two in his time, he was quick to deny all such allegations. But, our fearless founder Larry Flynt dug up some ladies of the night who said they had been with this glassy-eyed curmudgeon of a man. They even passed poly-graph tests to back up their statement. Then he surreptitiously admitted to " a very serious sin in my past " in July 2007 after his phone number turned up in records of an escort service run by the late Deborah Jeane Palfrey, known as the D.C. Madam.
What's amazing, is that Vitter's still around. Refusing to stand-down, he now fills his days trying to shoot down family planning funding in the proposed stimulus package instead of filling up prostitutes - Badump ching!
In what could be the Cinderella story of 2010, makes us remember when we knew Stormy as just a wide-eyed porno gal with a great set of tits. In the innocent times of 2003, she and other porn star turned politico Mary Cary took one hot shower together for our Hustler cameras. Proving they were bipartisan long before their political ambitions. You can watch their scene right now on HUSTLER.com and reminisce about how innocent and simple things were six years go.
Following up on our post of Our Favorite Sex Crazed Videos of 2008 we recently learned that deliciously hot lesbians and Hustler cover girls, Jayme Langford and Jana Jordan have formed a band of epic proportions. All hail, Pajamaband! I don"t know about the name, but just from their hotness alone I imagine them selling 2 million records, and single handedly reviving the music industry. Here's what Ms. Langford had to say about the affair:
"I took piano lessons as a kid and have always been a music fanatic. I took up the guitar about a year ago and I realized that I like it even more than the piano. I can sing pretty well and I have written a lot of really cool hot songs. My friend Jana Jordan plays the drums and my roommate Dee plays the guitar a little bit too... HOT PORNO GIRL BAND!!!
I have invested in all kinds of music equipment over the past few months so we have the full stack bass amps, Marshall guitar amps, keyboard, bass, and an assortment of pink sparkly guitars. We have the full venue not to mention the stripper pole in our living room, LOL! So anyway, Jana was in town and wanted to come over and jam so I went to Guitar Center and bought an awesome pink sparkly Tama drum set that matches my guitars perfectly!
We got everything hooked up and had our first jam session. It was great! We had so much fun and wore the cutest outfits! Dee was preoccupied during our first jam session but we made a cute video with Jana's camera phone.
Are we hot or what?
We have 2 songs that we came up with too, and my video editor is working on them right now before we put them on myspace. A cute model came over the other day, Lousia Lanewood and she said that she plays the bass and wants to join the band too! We can't wait for her to come over and jam with us. Now we have the blonde, redhead, half Japanese girl, and now a brunette!
I thought of the name Pajamaband a long time ago when we were having a party at our house and a bunch of my girlfriends and I put on matching little sexy pajama-dresses and we jammed out and took some pictures."
Since, Jayme wrote this they actually did end up in a proper studio to record their jams. Can't wait to hear the results!
To see Jayme and Jana doing a bit more than playing with instrument, join HUSTLER.com today!
This Ain't the Munsters XXX Offers Suggestions to Wayans Bros Munsters Adaptation
HUSTLER Video's recently released parody of a classic horror-comedy TV sitcom, This Ain't the Munsters XXX, has sparked major interest in both the adult and mainstream world. Another Munsters spoof to be honed by the Wayans Brothers was just announced on MTV's movie blog http://moviesblog.mtv.com/2008/11/11/wayans-brothers-munsters-adaptation-nearing-starting-gate. It's surprising that the Wayans Brothers have not tapped into the adult world for some suggestions on their upcoming spoof of The Munsters.
Hustler Video thought that it would be a nice gesture to offer up its creative services free of charge, especially since MTV's movie blog is asking fans of The Munsters to voice their opinions to help out the Wayans Brothers.
Hustler Video casting suggestions:
Lee Stone as Herman, Roxy DeVille as Lily, Shawna Leneé as Marilyn, Trent Soluri as Eddie and Gavin Wells as Grandpa.
Hustler Video director/writer suggestions:
Director Anton Slayer, self-proclaimed Munsters fanatic, will take extra measures to make sure to lend as much authenticity to the original series through his elaborate sets, costumes, and extra-green makeup.
Roger Krypton, notorious screenwriter for HUSTLER, is already putting together some hilarious and interesting scenarios for Munsters fans to enjoy!
For any other creative input regarding your Munsters spoof, please feel free to visit
MunstersXXX.com.
You probably won't find this through NetFlix or rummaging around some dusty thrift store with other dumpster-diving hipsters, but the good folks at 5minutestolive.com have done the legwork for you. Isn't that nice of them?
What has any of this to do with porn? Er, quite a lot actually... rock music, drugs, suicide, bad fashion, and bad music. Case closed.
As the DVD sleeves states, this is an amazing Christian propaganda film that focuses on the evils of rock music. See young Jeff ignore his mother and his preacher as he turns to the evil pleasures of really bad 70's cock rock. Apparently rock leads to all things bad, including suicide, drug use and amazingly awful fashion.
One of the most famous and wonderful of all Christian scare films, this one really packs on the preachy moments, going as far as showing a fully converted Jeff telling his rock n' roll friends that they are nothing by evil sinners, living the devil's life of rock debauchery.
Also on this disc is the jaw dropping video Ms. Velma's Most Incredibly Magnificent Christmas Week! Ms. Velma is an L. A. evangelist who teaches that beauty and fashion go hand and hand with the Lord and his word. This is her Christmas special, which she performs in a completely empty auditorium along with her youth choir, which is made up of a bunch of 42-year-old men!
This video is quite long by Interweb standards—almost seven and a half minutes—but it's more than worth watching. Frank sex talk between mother and daughter has never been this awesome or informative.
Things we learned about the ladies:
If the man ain't comin', he gonna be goin' somewhere else, puttin' his penis in someone else.
A lot of women will laugh and talk about a man if his penis is small.
Just because a man is in love with your vagina doesn't mean he's in love with you.
Dick will make you slap somebody.
The penis is a heat-seeking missile, like a rocket. Information is encoded in it making it do what it do.
Men launch their penis up in the vaginal canal. As a woman relaxes and breathes and sits on that penis and rock and move and rotate and find her rhythm and go up and down and back and forth and around in a circle, she starts getting her groove back. (Editor's Note: So that's how Stella did it!)
When the parts of penis hit them vagina walls, harmonizing and making them sing, a woman feels like she's in church jumping and shouting.
We're usually not fans of Celine Dion 'round these parts (Editor's Note: Liar!), but taken in the context of this video, she makes total sense. We've already booked our trip to Vegas. We're gonna try and catch one of her last shows at Caesar's Palace.
We now present: Animals Masturbating to Celine Dion
We are in no way condoning bestiality—man on beast action ain't our thang. Beast on his/herself action, however, totally cool.
PS - We can't tell if that headline is as clever as we think it is or we're just woozy from the "Master Cleanse".
Well, according the the Iranian parliament they are. As CNN reports, the country's governing body approved that "producers of pornographic works and main elements in their production are considered corruptors of the world and could be sentenced to punishment as corruptors of the world."
The term "corruptor of the world" is taken from the Koran where it is considered to be the most heinous of individual criminal offenses. Because the Iranian government is so awesome, this particular crime is punishable by death. Who would of thought that filming 3 people in consensual, double-anal sex would have anything to do with the erosion of global values?
We don't want to live in a world where those responsible for creating titles like Cum Junkies Like Cock, Do Me Right, White Boy #18, and The Gapes of Wrath can be punished with the ol' noose.
But then we remember we don't live in that world. We have color television, paved roads, and personal hygiene. They have lashings, extremism, and diarrhea inducing cuisine.
We think it's the 10th anniversary of P.T. Anderson's Boogie Nights or something, so we wanted to share this mashup. It features Luke Skywalker as an intergalatic Dirk Diggler. Good stuff.
If you feel like braving the banner ad ghetto that is XFanz.com, they've been running a series to celebrate one of P.T. Anderson's finest films. Check it out here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.
We're huge fans of Digital Playground here at HW HQ. We like pretty girls and comedy and that's what DP features in every title they release, especially their Jack's ___________ series. Their BTS clips alone are usually worth your hard-earned money.
Check out the most recent trailer for Jack's POV 6. It's pretty standard stuff (albeit Shay Jordan is insanely gorgeous) as far as trailers go until they reach the part featuring Shy Love. If you know anything about Shy at all, you'll understand why we find this so incredibly funny. It's kind of a cheap shot and we're pretty amazed at the ballsiness of including it, but we're happy they did.
And if you're interested in purchasing this fine title, you might consider stopping by HustlerHollywood. It's $5 cheaper there than on DP's site. Why? Because we care.
Our boss has caused quite a stir with the ad he ran in the Washington Post last weekend. When CNN decides to cover a move made by the legendary pornographer, it's kind of a big deal. Check out Wolf Blitzer discussing Larry's offer...
In a completely unrelated note, during our college years in DC we had gotten very drunk with our friends and heckled the piss out of Wolf when we came across him doing a live shot in front of the White House. It got to the point where we had half of the gawking crowd screaming "Wolf Blitzer!" and the other half responding with "Made up his name!"
If you've neither heard about nor played with Google Maps' new "Street View" function, you are missing out on what could possibly be the very reason the Internet was invented.
A little background: Google has been sending cars with specially equipped 360° cameras mounted on their roofs to systematically take pictures of cities around the United States. They've integrated these photos with their map feature and created a navigable environment where one can "walk" down streets.
Describing this new feature completely pales to seeing it in action for yourself, so we'll stop.
While some people are understandably upset about the privacy issues this raises, we're just psyched we've found yet another way to avoid doing work. If you find anything else noteworthy, feel free to let us know at Info@HustlerWorld.com.
We don't like to advocate the use of condoms...they're uncomfortable, smelly and hurt the abortion industry's bottom line. But we must give credit to Durex for dropping one of the most amusing Father's Day (let alone condom) ads we've come across.
The newspaper isn't actually, ya know, performing in movies or anything. That would be just plain silly. And weird. And a stupid joke. The not-LA Times is covering the industry in a 6-part series called "Exposed: Porn In The Valley". Each section discusses a particular facet (history, health, finance, etc.) of the 90 trillion-dollar-a-year business.
We're kinda stoked they didn't call the series "eXXXposed".
The whole thing is nothing special, but it's worth a read. Think of it like a college survey class: useless fodder for cocktail parties without any real analysis or insight.
(The rest of the package isn't supposed to be made available until later in the week, but because we're so brilliant we figured out a way around this.)
Despite being about two decades behind when it comes to having any sort of musical taste (Editor's Note: Motley Cruë is the best live band? Really?), the participants in Rock Confidential's First Annual Reader's Choice Awards are on point when it comes to pornography. Check out the two categories we won:
BEST ADULT MAGAZINE
Hustler
BEST ADULT DVD SERIES
Barely Legal
You can check out the rest of the winners here. Scroll down about halfway or you might feel an indescribable urge to tease your hair, get some bad tattoos and drink Coors Lite.
When our mom caught us with a copy of Suck My Cock, I'll Fuck Your Face during our formative years, she was less than pleased. Our punishment? Being made to watch it with her as she explained why pornography is anti-woman. Needless to say, our psychological scars run so deep that our therapy bill is in the low six figures.
Nautica Thorn, star HUSTLER Video's new release, The Da Vinci Load 2: Angels & Semen, recently braved the overwhelming enthusiasm and banner ads found in the XFanz offices to film a segment called "The Booble Minute".
News of the World amusingly reports that "shocked iPod bosses are iRate" over a sex toy and its accompanying advertising campaign.
Ann Summers' iGasm is a device that hooks up with your iPod and syncopates the music with a vibrator. The sales pitch reads: "Go at it hard and fast with a pounding drum 'n' bass track or chill with ambient classic." The ad itself looks like the ubiquitous "silhouettes" Apple has unleashed on buildings and bus stops worldwide, except there's a wire coming out of the lady's cooter region.
Apple has reportedly sicced the lawyers on the Ann Summers retail chains, sending what amounts to be a takedown notice: "We hope this request to remove it immediately will prevent us having to consider further action."
Whatever.
We're more interested in seeing the thing in action, as we welcome any and all bedroom assistance. Actually, we just want to make the most absurd playlist possible and subject our girlfriend to it. A few ideas:
"Dueling Banjos" by Arthur "Guitar Boogie" Smith and Don Reno
Anything by The Residents
"Raining Blood" from Slayer
"Benzi Box" by DangerDoom
Wu-Tang's entire catalog
If there are any other songs or artists that might freak our special lady out, send 'em along. We grow tired of monogamy.
If you weren't able to check out Larry discussing Jerry Falwell last night, you missed one of the few classy reactions to the news of the reverend's passing.
Thankfully, the Internets come to the rescue once again:
Part I:
Part II:
Watching Larry show such respect and deference towards a man he had life-long, fundamental differences with is a great demonstration of the tolerance that the late reverend so often failed to afford those he had issue with.
SugarDVD is a fantastic site for those looking for a Netflix-like solution for their porn viewing needs. Just ask Donna Martin.
The company recently made and then withdrew an offer to purchase a "celebrity" sex tap featuring Lauren Conrad and Jason Wahler of "Laguna Beach" and "The Hills" "fame". Making the offer was a no-brainer, but why'd they withdraw it?
Well, according a company spokesperson, it has to do with something Mr. Wahler said during his recent arrest:
"At the scene of his fourth arrest, Wahler made several comments that did not sit well with our company. SugarDVD finds these remarks disgusting and emotionally disturbing and we refuse to support any person who feels that it is in any way acceptable to rattle off racial slurs and slanderous language about African-American people..."
Apparently, Jason's racism is somehow different than SugarDVD offering titles like "Sierra Has a Negro Problem" or "My Daughter's Fucking Blackzilla" or "Slant Eye for the White Guy".
Before attempting to take the moral high-ground, they might want to examine what exactly they're selling.
But wait! Could this entire episode be nothing more than a cheap attempt at getting some free publicity? Nah...not in porn...never!
In case you missed Hustler's newest contract star on Adam Carolla this morning, we're doing you a solid and linking to the audio feed of her interview.
To be honest, we've never really been a fan of Adam "American Genius" Carolla. We don't dislike him, but we just never became an admirer during his tenure with Loveline. However, after listening to clips of today's show—available here—we're changing our tune. He gives great interview.
Highlights include:
Nikki Nine. (naturally)
A crazy Christian lady calling in and demonstrating what it's like to be both crazy and Christian. The two can be mutually exclusive, but in this particular case they aren't. We're also pretty sure she used the word "slutlet" to describe Nikki, which is pretty funny.
Learning that today is David Lee Roth's 52nd birthday.
Discovering that one of Nikki's ex-boyfriends ("I smell a little junior college coming from your direction" — Adam) is now dating the girl that Nikki cheated on him with. Awesome.
Anywho...do yourself a favor and check out the interview.
Also, make sure to check out Nikki's MySpace page. It's got all you could possibly want to know and more.
For those of you living under a rock for the past 3 or 4 months, somehow Michael Ninn got Eddie Van Halen to write and record two new tracks for his latest movie, Sacred Sin. We don't know how he did it, but we all owe Mr. Ninn our gratitude. Check out this promotional clip for the movie, featuring Mr. Halen doing what he does best.
And if your interest is sufficiently piqued (and it should be) you can pick up a copy of the Ninn Worx release from the store that thinks David Lee Roth is the only frontman Van Halen should ever have, HustlerHollywood.com.
Too bad he couldn't deal with the $50 million and creative freedom that Comedy Central offered him because, as this clip shows, Dave Chapelle is one funny man.
Tori Spelling Rents Porn Online, World Spins Off Its Axis
Page Six recently reported that Tori Spelling told Giant she gets her porn from SugarDVD.
Before Jax Smith, SugarDVD's owner, could release a list of what she rented, her people promptly and understandably put a stop to it. Can't have the world knowing that Donna likes herself some gangbangs of the world's oldest variety.
Instead of outing the former 90210-castmate and current noTORIous star as freakier than most, Jax offered her free porn for life in the form of a Sugar Star Card (a gold card, with some diamonds—more likely CZs—sprinkled on it). In fact, he went even further and said, "We are also offering our Sugar Star Card to any A-list celebrity that mentions using our service in the press. It is part of our 'SugarDVD - Porn for the Stars' campaign."
While calling Aaron's Spelling's daughter an "A-list celebrity" is laughable, we can't argue with the concept of offering celebrities free stuff to pimp your product to the masses. Lord knows if anyone needs free stuff, it's people who can more than afford it.
Did You Hear the One About the Kid's Show Host Who Lost Her Job Due to Lack of Foresight?
Meet Miss Melanie Martinez. Until very recently, she was the host of PBS's "The Good Night Show," a collection of stories and cartoons attempting to lull our nation's fat children to sleep. She lost her job because of this...
Like all ousted-due-to-poor-decision-making-abilities-former-professionals, she's more than welcome to work for us. We're going to have to see a resume and three letters of recommendation though...children's programming is obscene.
We've asked a lot of you today. Too many words, not enough nudity...we know, we know. Anyway, here's a version of the previously-mentioned "Aristocrats" joke as told by the children of Southpark.
This makes us giggle everytime we watch it. Behold...two Fleshlight "mouths" singing "Afternoon Delight". Yet another reason why Al Gore invented the Internet.
Here's a little clip from the more-than-consistently good Daily Show. Louie Gohmert doesn't exactly like decorated veteran Jack Murtha's proposal to withdraw our troops from the retardation that is Iraq. The video gets amazing at about the 50 second mark. Enjoy!
The New York Times asks, "Do My Knees Look Fat to You?" As a matter of fact, they do. Now go get me a sandwich, fatty!
Admit it. You used to masturbate to Pamela Anderson's slo-mo run along the beach at the beginning of every Baywatch episode. Think that's still possible? Sheesh.
This story reminds of us a joke a dearly departed grandmother told us: What's better than winning five gold medals at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.
This poor woman lost her job because her boobies got bigger. She should apply for a job here at HustlerWorld. We're always looking for interns with ginormous racks.
FEMA might think that spending money on "adult erotica" constitutes fraud, but we disagree. The money was for disaster relief. And what offers more peace of mind than looking at jubblies?
We agree with the New York Times about breast feeding. But while they think that bottle feeding is dangerous, we just like seeing ta-tas in public.
Continuing today's theme of mammary worship, check out this nice young San Diegoan's blog about her breast-enhancement surgery. Did we mention we need interns?
If anyone knows where we can get a hold of this yearbook let us know and we'll pay top dollar. And by "top dollar" we mean "nothing." Still, it'd be nice to have a copy.
A teacher carrying on an innapropriate relationship with one of her students is de rigueur at this point. This one, however, is girl on girl. Boner inducing.
We like this guy's moxie. We can, in fact, laugh at ourselves.
We grew up in the town next to this one. Good to see ol' Snortport is still making headlines.
Project Gutenberg—named after this guy, not this guy—has finally released an electronic book that we might actually make use of. The 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Captain Grose et al. is full of obscure words and phrases that are sure to help us out when we are at a loss. To wit:
ADMIRAL OF THE NARROW SEAS: One who from drunkenness vomits into the lap of the person sitting opposite to him.
ARBOR VITAE: A man's penis.
STATE: To lie in state; to be in bed with three harlots.
Look for us to make full use of this dictionary in the future. Who said writing about pornography can't be educational?
Scientists have developed a robot that can check for lumps in women's breasts. What's next? A machine that women can use to please themselves?
Turns out that Mrs. Paul McCartney (Heather Mills) is a dirty, dirty whore. True story: We were drunk in an East Hampton bar when the soon-to-be-divorced couple walked in. In our stupor we bellowed, "Is that Paul Simon and his one-legged wife?!" Who's getting the public beating now?
HustlerWorld's got a great new gallery featuring contract girl Memphis Monroe. While you're at it, why don't you take a gander at our pictorial featuring Joanna Angel as well.
Donny's a little bit rock 'n' roll. Marie's a little bit country. Her daughters are all whore.
Canada is set to host the first ever "feminist porn awards" tomorrow night, eh. They'll be celebrating the movies you can't jerk off with, but can give to your lesbian friends as a commitment ceremony present.
Gynotikolobomassophilia is defined as "Deriving sexual pleasure by nibbling on a woman's earlobe." Who knew there was an overwrought word for that? Whoever came up with this glossary of unusual sex terms, that's who.
Wait just a cotton-pickin' minute. You're telling us that we can download porn onto our PSP? Next thing you know, people will be using their iPods to view smut. Oh wait...
Scottsdale, Arizona is up in arms over the not-so-subtlely named "Pink Taco" restaurant. As long as there's no cheese on that taco, we don't see the problem.
The Cannes film festival is showing erotic movies that challenge the mainstream view and acceptance of pornography. As long as we can beat off to them, we won't have a problem.
Larry Flynt would probably approve of this young man's high school graduation speech.
We would like to formally apologize to this woman. We thought you were someone else.
We're heading out to the set of Barely Legal Corrupted #7 this afternoon, so we won't be able to bring you all the news that's (kinda) fit to print. Instead, we leave you with the very best in webternet goodness:
More and more women are saying "no" to having their period. More and more guys are saying "yes" to that idea.
Companies are encouraging mothers to bring newborns to the office. We wonder if that would fly at HUSTLER.
Why does it seem that every female high school teacher in the country is suddenly sleeping with their students?
You may now consider us a fan of Lordi, a Gwarlike outfit from a country that probably has national health care and low crime rates. Any band that can earnestly title a song "Hard Rock Halleluja" is getting thrown into the IPod mix.
This is Finland's official entry into this year's Eurovision song contest. Don't know what that is? Check out wiki wiki Wikipedia and impress your friends.
Update: We'll have you know that Lordi actually won the contest this weekend. It's like we can see into the future or something.
When Martin Luther King gave his "I have a dream" speech, do you think he was talking about people using his name to sell porn on the Webternet? That's kind of equality, right?
London is set to open the first "sex theme park" this summer. We're not so keen on the whole amusement park thing, but "The Humjob of Doom" and "Unprotected Intercourse Experience" sound like rides we can get behind.
This is why man is the dominant species. We don't pay to look at pictures of sex. We don't pay to look at pictures of monkey vagina.
At first, baby clothing emblazoned with "My Mommy's a MILF" seems kind of funny. Then, once you start thinking about it, isn't that kind of incestuous? We thinks there was a Greek tragedy written about this somewhere (Editor's Note: Bonus points go to whoever knows what the hell he's talking about.).
Continuing today's fellation of HBO, we thought we'd share this bit from their award-winning Western, Deadwood.
Remember, Larry Flynt's tireless work championing the First Amendment is one the reasons why Al Swearengen can get away with having such a brilliantly vulgar mouth.
This clip is from last week's E3 Video Game Expo. Watch the fanboys flock to the Nintendo booth once the doors open on the floor of the LA Convention Center.
A trailer for Digital Playground's first title in a new of interactive line, Pulse POV, is now available online for your viewing pleasure.
A woman in Washington state allegedly paid for breast enhancement surgery with a credit card stolen from her employer. We find her behavior unacceptable. She only went for a C cup.
Hillary Clinton just introduced a piece of legislation that would tie increases in Congressional salaries to increases in the minimum wage. She's still a tall glass of suck, but we have to give her credit on this one.
A new Harvard study shows that over half of students taking "virginity pledges" lose their V card in a year. Not only that, of the kids who admit to personally dissapointing Jesus, over 80% deny having taken the pledge in the first place.
We like to hold off for as long as we possibly can before mentioning the webternet's best stories—thinking of baseball usually helps—but this particular one is so good we couldn't hold back. The headline says it better than we ever could:
The director of the CIA resigns amidst allegations that he and a top aide attended poker games where prostitutes were used to bribe members of Congress and a NY tabloid is the only paper to cover it? What gives? More important question: Why has no one bribed us?
If high school adminstrators are barring anyone over the age of 20 from attending the senior prom, who's going to supply the alcohol? The wine coolers we have sitting in our trunk aren't going drink themselves.
Research soon to be published by a team of Swedish scientists found that the brains of lesbians react differently to sex hormones than straight women. We still think they're all a six-pack away from huffing some dong.
We haven't read Alicia Colon's piece on why women shouldn't have the right to vote. We've been too busy laughing at her last name.
While your little precious lady-blossoms are all unique and special and wonderful, there's always room for improvement. We've seen a vagina or two (or 6000) in our day, so we pretty much qualify as experts on all things labial. Don't question.
Here come the judge. Here come the judge. Here come the judge with booze for a couple of underaged girls.
The trailer for Digital Playground's "Hot Rod for Sinners" is now available for your viewing pleasure. Cars, Jana Cova and Jesse Jane...what more do you need?
We would have liked to offer Tericka Dye a position here at HustlerWorld, but then we found out she's been employed as a teacher before. She would cause too much of a disruption around the office.
May is officially "masturbation month". Shaking hands with the devil is cool and all, but what's really needed is a "hot girls sleeping with awkward, nerdy guys month". Any idea if June's available?
Blah blah blah the porn industry will decide the next generation DVD format blah blah blah. We swear, it's like the mainstream media isn't even trying.
We would wish Rush Limbaugh well on his road to recovery, but he's a loud-mouthed prick who escaped a drug conviction with a slap on the wrist. We hope he relapses.
Although we couldn't locate it on a map to save our life, a hardy congrats goes out to the Phillipines for showing some boobage.
This is HustlerWorld's 100th post. We'd like to thank the almighty Jeebus for making it all possible.
While their teacher was busy grading papers, three eighth-grade students in Alabama popped a porn in their classroom's DVD player. We don't condone the underage consumption of our DVDs, but this happened in Alabama. The students were in their mid-thirties.
Now we know why Jesse Jane is always so happy and her husband is always so tired.
There are a few directors out there that would probably like to get their hands on one of Super Soaker's new Oozinators. Take a look at this short clip and you'll understand why. High School is going to totally suck for the kids featured in this ad.
We're heading over to the filming of Hustler Contract Girl, Memphis Monroe's "Backwoods of Memphis" this afternoon, but wanted to share some Internets fun with you before leaving.
Child molestors and pedophiles can now update their MySpace profiles using a cell phone. High five for technology bringing people closer together!
Much to the chagrine and dissapointment of our co-workers, we take advantage of HustlerWorld HQ's pants-optional policy. It's liberating. See what it's like for yourself this Friday by observing "No Pants Day".
Ladies, this marks the first important step in shattering that pesky glass ceiling. We wonder if this will lead to more fights.
There are worse things to go into debt for. This is an investment in your future!
This has nothing to do with sex or porn or women, but it's one of the funniest blogs we've encountered in a while.
The newly reopened Mira Vista Resort gives new meaning to the expression "going bareback". Please note that that was not a "Brokeback Mountain" joke.
If you didn't get a chance to see Stephen Colbert at this weekend's White House Correspondants dinner, here's your chance to read the transcript. If you're lazy, you can track down the video here. Dick Cheney's already on route with six-pack and shotgun in hand to take care of business.
Which ever Yahoo! employee is responsible for this headline should get a raise. Or come work for us.
We're linking to this because it's Monday and everybody loves a good mustache.
Encino residents are upset that porn is being filmed in their exclusive neighborhood. We didn't care until we found out that Michael Jackson's family lives a few blocks away. We just know that Jemaine's been snooping around.
While we prefer Sasha Coen's Borat to his Ali G, this clip is just too good to pass up. In this little video, Ali G does his thing at the Cannes Film Festival (keep an eye out for Jenna Jameson):
Could President Bush win the coveted title of "Worse President In American History"? Rolling Stoneseems to think so. We are inclined to agree.
From the town that brought you legalized same-sex marriage: Safe sex advice via text message.
This really doesn't come as much of a surprise. With few exceptions, we've found that British women have an odd fascination with vacuum cleaners.
Sex toy or baby toy? Can you tell the difference? Take the quiz and find out. In the interest of full disclosure, we scored abysmally with a 7 out of 15.
SF Gate Columnist Mark Morford takes a warm, hard look at the high-end ($500+) self-pleasuring market. The good news? "The very existence of such luxurious toys means the lower-end market," Mr. Morford argues, "is saturated and widespread."
What's next to get hit by the Political Correctness Pain Train? Crayons? Oh wait, already taken care of. Howsabout ice cream? Yes! Bring us all the dirt you can find on Ben & Jerry.
The FDA released a statement last Thursday (4/20, natch) stating that marijuana "has no medical use or value". It's too bad the scientific community doesn't agree.
Notice the stark contrast between the douchebaggery of the host and interviewer and the annoyance visible on Neil Young's face. It's a long clip (6 min., 45 sec.), but worth watching if only to be reminded that some musicians remain both culturally and politcally relevant. Even if they're Canadian.
If more parents encouraged this, our job would be much, much easier.
Hold on just a cotton pickin' minute. Men make bad decisions when sex is involved? Who knew?
It shouldn't be shocking to learn that we don't like Bill "Republican Party Shill" O'Reilly. In our mind, he ranks right up there with Anne "I'm A Piece of Shit" Coulter and George "Where Am I" Bush. That's why we were so happy when we found this. Keith, next time you're in LA, we're taking you out drinking.
This really comes as no surpise. Last time we checked, Grandma was more interested in baking cookies than blowing grandpa. (Editor's Note: Gross.)
We're heading over to the set of Shy Love's "Mass Destruction' this afternoon, but didn't want to leave before offering the best stories from around the Internets. We're thoughtful like that:
If anyone wanted to purchase this for us, we' be forever in your debt. We'd also be in rehab in less than a month.
The South won't be rising again anytime soon. (Zing!)
These buffalo wings sure are great. Can I pay you for sex now?
We spend much of our workday looking at porn—we have 3 movies playing right now. We understand that you may not work in such a sexually liberated environment, so we're offering you this clip about new a viewing technology that won't make the bossman suspicious:
In response to Comedy Central's refusal to air an episode of South Park showing an image of the Prophet Mohammed, Trey Parker and Matt Stone show Jesus crapping on George W. Bush and the American flag. We love the first amendment.
This may be the most important formula since E=mc².
The New York Times attempts to muscle in on our market-share. Try showing a little nip next time guys.
We've always been a fan of former President Bill Clinton. His comments during a recent meeting of InterAction, an alliance of humanitarian organizations, only make us like him more.
During our conversation with Octavio Arizala earlier this week we spoke about his upcoming Vivid-Alt movie, "ReBelle Rousers" (Editor's Note: We had incorrectly called it "Rebel Rousers". Our apologies). Lo and behold, a trailer for the movie has already been made available.
If you haven't checked out Wonder Showzen, the following clip might entice you to pick up season 1, out now on DVD. The twisted minds behind the show ask children the simple question, "What's the difference between boys and girls?"
This may be an oldie, but it's still a goodie. Stephen Colbert of The Daily Show interviews Kick Ass Pictures' Mary Carey and Mike Kulkis about attending a Republican-sponsored dinner. All it took was $5000. Whoever said that the GOP is not the party of inclusion must have been poor.
In an effort to make Pennsylvania's prison's more hospitable for female employees, officials have banned pornography. Let the increase in prisoner B/B/A begin!
There comes a time in every woman's life that she must pack up her genitalia and slowly walk off into the sunset. We're just happy that time has finally come for Liza Minelli.
This just might be the Holy Grail for viewing porn.
Please tell us that the women interviewed for this study were all found in convents or protesting outside of abortion clinics.
Watch in awe as one of the sexiest women on the planet shills for Adidas. Who knew that this awful arcade novelty could actually be hot? Then again, we shouldn't have been so surprised. Jenna Jameson can pretty much spice up anything. With April 15th quickly approaching, we're hoping that she'll start doing taxes.
Take a look at Gram Ponante's chat with Spin.com's new sex columnist and VCA contract girl, Joanna Angel. She's purty.
According to Time, "porn curriculum [is] quietly taking root in the ivory tower." With classes like "Pornography in Popular Culture" and "Cyberporn and Society" being offered, we're a little dissapointed that no one's asked us to guest lecture.
AntiInnocence Video has launched their official website, www.antiinnocence.com. If anyone's interested, the domain www.proguilt.com is still available.
This makes like 9 assistants that Naomi Cambell has assaulted. When will the help finally learn? If you're going to work for a woman who's only job it is to be tall and beautiful, you have to expect the occasional phone upside the head. It's what you get for being a short and not her.
We apologize for the laugh track you hear on this clip, but we couldn't pass up sharing it. A very satisfied "Randy" calls QVC and touts the porn-viewing merits of his Dell computer. If all of Dell's customers are as happy as this guy, we're tempted to buy one. Of course, we'd only use it for work-related matters.
From time to time, HustlerWorld encounters a video that we have no choice but to provide for our loyal readers. In this Daily Show clip, correspondent Samantha Bee examines why there are no male, asian actors working in the industry today.
You probably won't find this through NetFlix or rummaging around some dusty thrift store with other dumpster-diving hipsters, but the good folks at 5minutestolive.com have done the legwork for you. Isn't that nice of them? 
Well, according the the Iranian parliament they are. As CNN 
We're huge fans of Digital Playground here at HW HQ. We like pretty girls and comedy and that's what DP features in every title they release, especially their Jack's ___________ series. Their BTS clips alone are usually worth your hard-earned money. 
If you've neither heard about nor played with Google Maps' new "Street View" function, you are missing out on what could possibly be the very reason the Internet was invented.
The newspaper isn't actually, ya know, performing in movies or anything. That would be just plain silly. And weird. And a stupid joke. The not-LA Times is covering the industry in a 6-part series called "Exposed: Porn In The Valley". Each section discusses a particular facet (history, health, finance, etc.) of the 90 trillion-dollar-a-year business. 
Despite being about two decades behind when it comes to having any sort of musical taste (Editor's Note: Motley Cruë is the best live band? Really?), the participants in Rock Confidential's First Annual Reader's Choice Awards are on point when it comes to pornography. Check out the two categories we won:
In case you missed Hustler's newest contract star on Adam Carolla this morning, we're doing you a solid and linking to the audio feed of her interview. 
, the following clip might entice you to pick up season 1, out now on DVD. The twisted minds behind the show ask children the simple question, "What's the difference between boys and girls?" 
